Know Thyself

6/10/2021
ENFJ-A

Know Thyself.

(or how ‘Extroverted Introvert’ continues)

The blog has given me more than enough incentive to reflect on my personality. It’s with good reason, I refer to it as ‘my personal therapist’. Being in constant contact with the younger generations is very enlightening in this respect too: most of them are very much aware of their traits and what they’re all about. I cannot really recall us being so into defining ourselves when we were younger. But I think it’s a good thing they’re just preparing for a bright future. The fact we’ve been provided with a lot of extra ‘free time’ lately, might also have helped with searching the internet for answers about ‘who-I-am-and-why’.

Where I in ‘Extroverted Introvert‘ dive into my ‘relationship’ with other humans and the way I’m called a ‘social butterfly’, while not exactly feeling like one, here I will try to dig a little deeper into other sides of my personality too. You might not care for all of this at all, that’s fine. But if you’re like me and trying to understand yourself better and why you respond the way you do, this might be a little tip right here. I am also hoping, understanding myself better, will help me interact with others better. Apparently, it just fits one of my traits to want this 😂

Matrix fans will have recognized the title, which I basically stole from a scene, where Neo is visiting the Oracle. It’s always amazing how much disguised truths one can find in movies. Though the story might be fictional, sometimes you can get hit by a truth so hard, you’ll never forget it. ‘Know Thyself’ is one of those motto’s, we valued throughout our lives. Fortunately, we have a lifetime to get to know ourselves, which is needed, since we’re all subject to change. Well, most of us are anyway and hopefully for the better.

The older I am getting, the more I feel like I am ‘growing into myself’, but there’s always room for improvement and I got curious when I found these ‘personality tests’ a lot of my friends had been doing. The results should not be a big surprise to me, but of course there can be some comments about certain traits, I am not too happy to hear about 😬. There’s also the fact, it’s a common thing to be asked to talk about yourself during job interviews and I don’t want to be stuck in either the ‘normal’ read: bland, speech, nor in some flowery fairytale about who I should be to get any job.

Mind 🤯

It’s one of those moments in life, where some preparation can be very helpful indeed. Most people don’t really like to describe themselves, which I understand, because I might look at myself in some way, which doesn’t necessarily mean, others see me the same way. Sometimes it’s good to wake up and smell the roses. Or, maybe it’s not exactly roses we smell.

Having gone through the extroverted/introvert guide as well as the Sparktype-test, I thought it would be fun to do this next one: the free 16personalities test. I know, I know, these tests are just giving you a guideline, but it’s interesting to see the outcome and if you follow the directions correctly – mainly just answering the questions HONESTLY – you might actually not only recognize yourself in it, but also have found the right words to properly describe yourself, the next time someone asks you to open up. ‘Best’ part will be, you’re not only getting the nice-side comments, but also the dark-side. Uhuh.

Similar tests are all over the internet of course, so I picked this one and ended up also reading the guide provided by the same site I visited last time, Verywellmind, referring to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Guide, where the use of the Letters come from. The test takes about 15 minutes – or less if you’re quick – and the results are shown right after completing all the answers. Now let’s go through my results and see if you recognize me. I certainly did, including unfortunately the less flattering sides. There’s comfort in knowing nobody’s perfect and I am still a Work in Progress. Anyways, at home I’m known as ‘Everybody’, so I may dodge that one 🙄.

Depending on how honestly you will answer the questions, the results will of course vary. And as honest as I think I am – or at least try to be – answering a bunch of questions about how I think I will respond to events in real life and/or, to people around me, is quite the challenge. Again, trying not to paint a nicer picture of myself than reality reflects, can be tough, because I might WISH to react in a certain manner, doesn’t mean I actually will, when the occasion arises.

Energy

So here we go! The result of my test told me I am an Assertive Protagonist, code: ENFJ-A. (Or code red if you like).

At first glance, the assertive part is true for sure and is corresponding with the extroverted/introvert result. Trying not to underestimate your intelligence, but I had to Google the word Protagonist to be sure about its meaning. Well that was something…mind you, the following words are not mine!

Like, really??

The introduction on the 16personalities site, regarding my profile, mentions, I quote: ‘Protagonists are natural-born leaders, full of passion and charisma. Forming around two percent of the population, they are oftentimes our politicians, our coaches and our teachers, reaching out and inspiring others to achieve and to do good in the world. With a natural confidence that begets influence, Protagonists take a great deal of pride and joy in guiding others to work together to improve themselves and their community’. This, together with the type description above, totally agree with the outcome of the Sparktype test I did: Primary Sparktype – Advisor, Shadow Sparketype – The Performer. Pfeew.

Though I often really don’t feel like a ‘natural-born leader’, I have to admit when it comes to any job, I seem to always end up somewhere in a management position. So this is nice for me to know, but there’s more. Apparently I am a ‘Strong Believer in the People’ which often causes internal struggle, but that ‘shouldn’t deter me from supporting a case I believe to be just’. This is true also, sometimes to a very uncomfortable extent.

Without diving too deep into all the details and descriptions – which you can read for yourself, but I’m guessing you’d rather check your own personality type 😉 –  below I will list what the rest of my profile looks like, divided in Type (Assertive Protagonist), Code, Role and Strategy.

Nature 🌳

The Code attached to my personality type is ENFJ-A (aka The Giver):

🔹 Extraverted

🔹 Intuitive

🔹 Feeling

🔹 Judging 

🔹 Assertive

The ‘Judging’ trait startled me at first, until I found the judging is done towards work, planning and decision-making. It made a lot of sense then.

it seems it’s like that

The ‘Role’ attached to my personality type is ‘Diplomats’. Shared personality traits: Intuitive (N) and Feeling (F)

✴️ Longing for Connection94% of Diplomats say they prefer deep conversation to small talk. I am definitely part of that 94%. I don’t mind a little chit-chat and some healthy gossip as much as the next person, but ehm… I need some depth soon after that, thank you very nice.

✴️ Striving for Change97% of Diplomats say they often drift into daydreaming or fantasizing about different ideas or scenarios. Well, when I think about it – pun unintended – yeah.. I love to try and imagine how things might play out and won’t stick to just one scenario. Of course the real outcome is mostly not anything I anticipated at all.

✴️ A Higher Purpose86% of Diplomats say their ideal job requires a lot of creativity. That’s a YES for me. If the job itself does not provide for some creativity, I will implement my own, which will cause trouble sometimes. Eventually, I do need the challenge. Aah well.

✴️ The Need to Belong77% of Diplomats say they often feel a strong need to belong. As much as I don’t mind working alone, teamwork can give me a lot of satisfaction – along with some frustration too 😉. Knowing you’ve achieved something with your team is a highly appreciated personal reward.

✴️ What is Success, Anyway?Only 18% of Diplomats say their career is the most important thing in their lives. Yeah well, I already mentioned I don’t really see myself as a natural-born leader, but when I do end up in a position like that, success only counts as such, when any personal rewards are achieved, which might have nothing to do with the job. Literal success is a bonus.

✴️ Time to Leap – 76% of Diplomats say they usually trust their gut feelings – more than any other Role. I DO trust my ‘gut feeling’, though I would rather call it faith to be honest. Anyway you look at it, it comes from my inner-self and you all know: I’ll just take it one leap at the time.

Tactics 📝

The ‘Strategy’ attached to my personality type is ‘People Mastery’. Shared personality traits: Extraverted (E) and Assertive (-A)

✳️ Bold and Confident75% of People Masters say they’re good at executing their ideas – more than any other Strategy. Well, Yes and Yes to the Bold and Confident, but I don’t think I really fit in the mentioned 75%. Though the statement Is Bold and Confident 😅.

✳️ Nothing to Prove?Only 35% of People Masters say they often feel regret. Regretting things is not wrong, though cherishing regret is of no use at all. When you believe you’ve made the right decision at that time – or at least, the best you could do – then regret is most likely only caused by the fact, you’ve learned and grown in the meantime and would now make different choices. I aim not to give in to the ‘if-I-knew-back-then-what-I-know-now’ urge.

✳️ Finding BalanceMost People Masters fall somewhere in the middle: Ideally, they embrace healthy ambition while finding social fulfillment and connection. Yep. I don’t consider myself to being overly ambitious, but it would surely never outdo the social side of life. Still a long way from a social butterfly though.

✳️ People Masters in Love26% of People Masters say they’re good at attracting new partners – far more than any other Strategy. WHAHAHAHAHA. OK 🤐

✳️ Speaking Up91% of People Masters are comfortable challenging their boss’s direction if necessary. Oh Hell Yes. I think I wrote enough about that stuff for you to get the idea.

✳️ Going For It79% of People Masters say they see problems as opportunities. It’s just the best option for me, or I’ll might get either overwhelmed or discouraged. Nobody needs that in their life, I sure don’t. I might have some initial doubts, but hey, just make the most of every situation, it’s the best way to learn along the way.

Bored out of your skull yet? Well too bad, I’m not done yet. I want to finish with my apparent strengths and weaknesses. Always fun to read the first list and however crinchy the second might be, I will share them both, using my own words. If you want to know the official descriptions, you’re free to visit the site.

Identity 🛂

Protagonist Strengths:

👍 Tolerant: I am a team player and will listen to other peoples’ opinions, even if we don’t agree, because I am – sometimes painfully – aware I don’t have all the answers. We need to built and grow together!

👍 Reliable: I really, really, don’t like to let anybody down, which doesn’t mean it never happens. I will give it my all – again – up to sometimes uncomfortable measures – to see things through.

👍 Charismatic: Well heck 😳. Referring back to my Shadow Sparktype, The Performer, I seem to be able to capture an audience. I’ll pick up the mood / atmosphere in a room and will try to accommodate the audience accordingly. I might not feel the social butterfly, but connecting is not an issue for me.

👍 Selfless: Uniting the above, there’s me, trying to do good for a/any, community, whether it be at home or on a global stage. Well, yeah… Seeing as what is happening with the blog and then specifically the music side…our goal has always been to bring people together and Do Some Good. Like we’re really one big loving family.

👍 Natural Leaders: I’m repeating myself but yeah. I’m not one to actually look for a leader role, though I might end up there anyway. This often happens because of the request and/or the cheering on by others, due to my overall positive outlook and strong (?) personality. Sorry-not-sorry.

Everybody’s Perfect

I saved the best for last, here we go:

Protagonist Weaknesses:

👎 Overly Idealistic: People often tell me I am naïve, for thinking, hoping or even expecting, others to feel the same way about fighting for a cause. Though they might appreciate my principles and even share some of them, they can also ‘fight’ me, when the case seems a lost cause to start with. I am still convinced I rather be naïve than become a sceptic or bitter!

👎 Too Selfless: Since I really dislike to let anyone down, once I started out to help, I might get caught up in the case and have to be careful not to make their problem my own. If I get carried away, I might end up getting lost myself and not being able to help anybody at all. Still I do call myself a coldhearted bitch many a time. Just sayin.

👎 Too Sensitive: I’m pretty receptive to criticism and will always try to use that to better the gameplay, not always succeeding of course. It happens I take things too personally even if the actual issue is not my problem to fix, just because I feel responsible. Hence trying to fix things that aren’t mine to fix and worrying if I’m doing enough to achieve that goal. Over-Achiever Much.

👎 Fluctuating Self-Esteem: I am just going to quote this one literally, because it’s On Point: ‘Protagonists define their self-esteem by whether they are able to live up to their ideals, and sometimes ask for criticism more out of insecurity than out of confidence, always wondering what they could do better. If they fail to meet a goal or to help someone they said they’d help, their self-confidence will undoubtedly plummet’.

👎 Struggle to Make Tough Decisions: Yeah… I think I’ve been pretty honest about that here in several articles. It’s the Leap of Faith which is always one thought away. However, once the decision is made, I’ll be mentally getting into position!

Well Alright Then! Did you, or did you not recognize me? I know, it might be hard if you only just tuned in to my blog and not knowing me in real life is also not making it easier. You can always leave a comment below if you feel you need to 🙃.

I loved doing this test and it might not be the last either. It’s never too late to learn and learning about myself is definitely worth a lot. For any new job, but not only that, for any new people I am meeting on a daily bases, it helps me to know what my strengths and weaknesses are. It might make interacting a lot more interesting, especially if I would take it a step further and find out what kind of personality types the people around me are… Just kidding, I am not that crazy. Or Am I.

At least I can say I Know Myself. Can You?

Source: Common English Bible – He Knows Us Better Than We Know Ourselves

Enjoy the Weekend Lovelies. Just Know, I’ll Love You Anyways

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